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Byron Bay, will you marry me?

Chopping fruit, assembling platters and icing the semi-burnt birthday cake. Oh how I love birthday party preparations (there was a little sarcastic inflection there for those of you who missed it). And the birthday cake: check it out!

It all goes rather smoothly, Caleb is suitably chuffed (if not a little bemused) and all the kids have a grand time at the park. As we bundle up the troops, my brother James asks: “Where are they? I thought I had three kids.” Me: “So did I. I think I left one at a park once.”

Ah comedy. Without you I think child-rearing would have me curled in a little ball in some random corner of the world crying for a shot of Pethadine.

We get the kids settled in with our babysitters-of-choice (or more accurately, our babysitters-who-could) and hit the road for a romance and gig-fuelled weekend at my favourite place in the entire world: Byron Bay.

Chapter Two: The Child-Free Weekend Away

– Going shopping: Tim buys me my Mother’s Day gift of choice – a new cap – which, while neither practical nor writing-related (usually the only two things I’m comfortable spending money on) makes me feel like a million bucks. Well, at least $15,000.

– Having the yummiest immunity-building juice ever (I’m not sure if that claim is substantiated, but it certainly made me feel happier at the time, so let’s run with it.) Me: “Here, have a taste of my world.” Tim (sipping my juice): “I think that’s very symbolic.”

– Taking our time strolling on the beach and talking for hours, uninterrupted. Inconceivable.

– Heading back to the Beach Resort for the gig and realising it actually starts in half an hour!

Chapter Three: The Gig

– Chowing down on curry galore, which leaves me wondering how I’ll cope gigging on a full stomach.

– Having the sound guy approach me literally SECONDS before I go onstage to tell me he’s not sure if the CD is going to work. Aaaaagghh!

– Getting an actual standing ovation after “One Night” (okay, so it was only three people, but I’ll take what I can get) and having one woman grab her table’s floral arrangement and throwing it towards the stage. Three pairs of legs and a couple of daisies: I have arrived.

– Seeing Tim gush – it’s been a while since he’s come to see me perform (something which we fully intend to remedy regularly as part of our ‘let’s make our marriage an actual priority’ strategy) so to have him support me verbally as well as practically is magic.

– Having people come up afterwards and give beautiful Byron-ish compliment after compliment, especially the mummies. Some of my favourites:

“You were the highlight of the whole night!” “I miss you already!” (blowing me a kiss) “Gees you’re tall.”

– Receiving another request for the lyrics to “One Night in Labour” (the other was from a lady in Tassie) so I may well bite the bullet and put them on my website soon. If it’s good enough for Tim Minchin…

– Having Sandy Gandhi, who organised and hosted the entire night, give me incredibly kind praise, thanks and a promise of a return invite.

Seriously, Byron Bay, will you marry me? I don’t think it counts as bigamy if you happen to be a town.

Chapter Four: The Good Night’s Sleep

After hot chocolates at a suitably funky cafe, Tim and I hit the hay.

Tim: “Shall I set the alarm clock?”

Big pause.

Tim: “Gotchya!”

We sleep in until 10.42am.

Wait, let me type that again, I just want to check something.

We sleep in until 10.42am.

Yep, still smiling!

Tim then goes out to the car and brings in a big box.

Tim: “I think Dad put something in here for you.”

Me: “What?”

I open it up and look inside. I cannot believe it. Luckily Tim has a forklift on hand to assist with getting my jaw off the ground and reassembling it to my head.

A brand-spanking-new laptop computer.

I think I am going to die.

Wait, let me type that again, I just want to check something.

Thus, I sit at 11.25am in bed, typing away on my new lap-top.

Yep, still smiling.

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Hey ho! Nowadays you can find me blogging again over here. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!

These days you can find me over at If you feel inclined to relight my fire.

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